Nice security systems you have there

Bush, under the guise of anti-terrorism, tells us we need to slacken up on the civil liberties. It's important to know who we call and what books we check out. Why so interested in reading about Islam? Could that call to Pakistan be to the Taliban? Meanwhile, an unemployed guy in the UK is hacking into the government's computers.

LONDON (Reuters) - To the United States, he is a seriously dangerous man who put the nation's security at risk by committing "the biggest military computer hack of all time".

But Briton Gary McKinnon says he is just an ordinary computer nerd who wanted to find out whether aliens and UFOs exist.

During his two-year quest, McKinnon broke into computers at the Pentagon, NASA and the Johnson Space Center as well as systems used by the U.S. army, navy and air force. [Emphasis mine. More here.]

Fireable offense, yes or no?

From Ananova Quirkies:

Serbian police have admitted they may have accidentally put an explosive device on a plane to London.

It happened after an exercise to test sniffer dogs at Surcin airport in Belgrade went wrong, local daily Blic reported.

Officers had put explosives into luggage destined for Heathrow airport, as well as Paris, Milan, and Athens, and let sniffer dogs loose to find them.

The dogs found all the devices except one before police realised they had not marked the bags and could not find the final package or identify where it was headed.

Full story here.

Prisoners of War game

This interactive game on the Geneva Conventions is engaging and informative. "Game," perhaps isn't the best word for it. It does make my human-rights-lovin' heart do a happy dance. It's a joint project of nobelprize.org and the Nobel Peace Center.

Can people behave as they like during times of war? No, they can't. The Geneva Conventions of written rules and articles make some acts unlawful. Nearly all countries in the world have promised to follow these rules by signing up. The Red Cross ensures that these rules are followed.

Other educational tools at the Nobel Prize site, including Nobel Peace Radio where you can listen to Nobel leaureate speeches.

All ready for the World Cup

Via the BBC:

The world's oldest football is being sent to Germany for the World Cup

The 450-year-old ball will form the centrepiece of an exhibition on the history of the sport.

Staff at its current home in Stirling's Smith Museum are preparing the delicate artefact for its trip to the Museum fur Volkerkunde in Hamburg.

The ball was once the property of Mary Queen of Scots and museum bosses in Germany were keen to display it after deeming it the oldest in existence.

Although it looks rather metal-esque in the photo, it's actually made of a pig's bladder. Could have lived without knowing that I suppose.

Schoene Nase (beautiful nose)

Sophie's got the cutest nose. Am I not right? She even has freckles.

Dogs have such a cool way of creating commonalities. I know several of my neighbors only by their dogs' names. I'm sure they don't know my name but they do know Sophie's.

I went to the dentist today. The hygienist I see is very shy. She would hardly respond when I talked to her. Then one day I saw a picture of her dog on the shelf. Now every time I go in for a cleaning we chat almost nonstop about our dogs and their antics.

Bruise update

It's been almost three weeks and it continues to morph colors. It's now working into a dark purple near the cuticle. Some of my co-workers are entranced by the color. It's like nail polish, but not.

Happy birthday shipping container

Yesterday was the 50th anniversary of the shipping container (thank you Boing Boing for this I-didn't-know-I-needed-that fact). From the entry on Flickr:

It may not be printed in red on your calendar, but April 26 is an important date in economic history. Fifty years ago, the Ideal-X, a war-surplus oil tanker with a steel frame welded above its deck, loaded 58 aluminium containers at a dock in Newark, New Jersey. Five days later, the ship steamed into Houston, Texas, where trucks took on the metal boxes and carried them to their destinations.

In some countries shipping containers are used as affordable building options. I saw some of these made into schools in South Africa. Here's an interesting bit about their use in and around Cape Town.

Loving "I'm With Stupid"

"I’m With Stupid” by the Pet Shop Boys is absolutely superb! You can listen and see the video on their site. You have to scroll under the photo on the right to see the links to the video. The song easily becomes an earworm. But in this case, a welcome one!

Normally Neil Young drives me nuts. During Live Aid we kept yelling, "I'll give you all the money you want. Just get him off the stage!" I am now, reluctantly, in his corner due to "Let's Impeach the President." Link to the lyrics here. How odd that the lyrics were released exclusively to Fox News. Cognitive dissonance, man!

Funny kids

The other night I was walking Sophie. She was wearing her sweater since it was a bit chilly. A 3- or 4-year-old girl in a little pink helmet, riding a pink bike with training wheels, saw Sophie and yelled "Puppy!" Then she yelled at her brother, "That puppy is wearing a jacket!"

Yesterday, I remarked on a co-worker's cute skirt. She mentioned that it was the right length so you could see the bite marks on the back of her legs -- from one of her kids. During said incident, when she told the child that she didn't want to be bit, the child replied, "But Mom, I was only biting your pants."

A Changed Man

A Changed Man is one of the most interesting, funny and compelling books I've read in a long time. (Actually, I listened to it on my iPod.) I didn't want it to end.

The story begins with Vincent Nolan, a skinhead who's had a change of heart and shows up at the office of World Brotherhood Watch, a human rights organization run by a Holocaust survivor.

The author allows you to get inside the characters' heads by alternating the narrator. You get full access to each person's internal dialogue and motivations. It can be sad, thought provoking, maddening and absolutely hilarious.

From the Publishers Weekly review on amazon.com:

Prose tests assumptions about class, hatred and the possibility of change in her latest novel, a good-natured satire of liberal pieties, the radical right and the fund-raising world. The "changed man" of the title is Vincent Nolan, a 32-year-old tattooed ex-skinhead who appears one morning in the New York offices of World Brotherhood Watch, a foundation headed by Meyer Maslow, a Holocaust survivor. Vincent declares that he has had a personal conversion (never mind that it was triggered by a heavy dose of Ecstasy) and wants to work with the foundation to "save guys like me from becoming guys like me." ... Prose doesn't shy away from exposing the vanities and banalities behind the drive to do good. Fortunately, her characters are sturdy enough to bear the weight of the baggage she piles on them. Her lively skewering of a whole cross-section of society ensures that this tale hits comic high notes even as it probes serious issues.

Sweet animals

From Yahoo. Some people go crazy for babies. I go crazy for animals, especially the dog variety.

CONNELLSVILLE, Pa. - A pug puppy rejected by his mother has found a new, more welcoming family — a cat and her three kittens.

Kelly Kent, of Connellsville, said her 2-year-old cat, Zoey, has been nursing a black pug puppy since he was rejected by his mother in late March. Zoey doesn't usually like dogs but seems to have made an exception, Kent said.

The puppy, who belongs to Kent's neighbor, is about the same size as Zoey's kittens and regularly lines up for milk with his adopted feline siblings.

It is not unusual for mothers to adopt in nature, even if the baby is of another species, said William Shepherd, a Uniontown veterinarian. Shepherd said a puppy can drink a cat's milk, but warned that Zoey might not be able to produce enough as the young pug gets older and bigger.

The pug puppy, the runt of his litter, doesn't yet have a name.

Speaking of sweet animals, look at these beautiful hedgehogs!

Note from the universe

Well now, this sounds right! Sounds like good advice from a Grandma.

"Do you know how most people get jobs they love? They first loved the job they had, and everyone noticed. And do I mean everyone.

The Universe

The same goes for most people who get cars they love, homes they love, people they love, and bodies they love."

Gummi, lovely gummi

I still haven't found the gummi Nativity that I saw in Germany. But I swear, it did exist. Gummi Mary, Joseph and Jesus.

In the mean time, I did find gummi fried eggs and brains via the Sweet Factory. I wonder if they're Haribo. Definitely the best of the gummi makers.

Clogged toilet, friend or foe?

If you live in New York City, you're more likely to have a clogged toilet, according to Scott Tissue and Clog Clinic. This sounds like a joke, but sadly, it is not. (See "Toilet Issue: New York City Named Nation's Cloggiest.")

The SCOTT Clog Clinic, an authority on common-sense solutions for avoiding stopped-up toilets, sponsored the survey to help Americans understand just how much of a nuisance a toilet clog can be and to offer common-sense ways to avoid such toilet-paper dissolve-ability problems. The release of the survey also comes as National Plumber's Day is on April 25...

Clog Clinic researchers say toilet clogs frequently occur during heavy flushing periods -- like halftime of the Big Game and Black Friday, the day after the Thanksgiving feast...

On behalf of the SCOTT(R) Brand, the Ketchum Global Research Network commissioned a survey to determine the cloggiest markets in America.

Specifically, the survey sought to quantify: [Snarky comments, mine.]

• Cloggiest & least cloggy among DMA cities and C&D counties
• Americans' experience with clogged toilets Mostly good
• Feelings about clogged toilets Happiness
• Type of items flushed down a toilet Combs, pets
• Perceptions of clogged toilets It couldn't possibly happen to us
• Knowledge about clogged toilets Toilets don't clog, do they?

Jerky gun

Beef Jerky Factory Plus
"Make jerky at home. Great for making jerky the way you like it and at a fraction of the cost. This kit includes: jerky gun, three attachments for various shapes and jerky spice/cure packets."

Quick! Order it now!

Oblong Oreos

This is rather interesting. For a limited time this summer Oreo is going to sell oblong Oreos.

AdAge says the "limited-edition" Oreos are "a bid to capitalize on the dunk portion of the longtime 'Twist, Lick, Dunk' theme" used by the Nabisco sandwich cookie. The oblong cookies will be marked with lines like "soaked," "soggy," and "dry." (More)

I'd prefer "dip," "full immersion" and "mush."

Hot dog and paranoia

I love Patina. And, although it is very early in the year, I am adding the Pooch Pot Holder to my birthday wish list. I'm such a sucker for anything dog related.

And I don't need The Paranoid's Survival Kit-- I no longer work with crazy people -- but I would like it. Something nice to leave on the desk, especially if you expect visitors.

"For the employee who's overly suspicious of co-workers and convinced that every bit of office politics is actually a conspiracy, this tongue-in-cheek kit outlines the top 10 signs of paranoia, along with ways to outwit the bad guys. It comes with rubber gloves, invisible ink, light to detect cryptic messages, and a rearview computer-terminal mirror."

Straight to the point

This is so mean; I love it.

Alnwick treehouse

A huge tree house, part of the Alnwick Garden in Alnwick, England. If this had been there back when I was, I might never have left. Oh, to be in England in the spring...

Films and moods

Courtesy of The Guardian, the film mood matcher. Moods to choose from include:

• When you're having a bad hair day
• When you're trying to give up smoking
• When the planet's being invaded
• When you're having an existential crisis

Meat as a condiment

930 calories and 63 grams of fat. Do you want CPR with that?

ST. LOUIS, April 18 /PRNewswire/ -- Using meat, such as bacon, as a burger topping is not a new idea, but Hardee's has taken the concept to its extreme today with the launch of the new Philly Cheesesteak Thickburger(TM). It's meat-on-meat as Hardee's new burger features a 1/3-lb. Angus beef Thickburger patty piled high with thinly sliced steak, two kinds of cheese and green peppers and onions. The result is a truly delicious and authentic tribute to the classic Philly Cheesesteak -- as only Hardee's can make it.

"Other restaurants have just topped burgers with cheese, peppers and onions, and called them 'Cheesesteak burgers,' but they didn't taste like a Cheesesteak," said Brad Haley, executive vice president of marketing for Hardee's. "So, when we set out to make a great Philly Cheesesteak burger, we literally put a Cheesesteak on a burger, steak and all."

Full story here.

National Pooper Scooper Week, April 24-30

SANTA CLARITA, Calif., April 14 /PRNewswire/ -- The Association of Professional Animal Waste Specialists (aPaws) was founded in February 2002 by a group of pooper-scoopers who believe that every dog should have its day. In recognition of a growing problem in our communities, aPaws has established a special week of educating pet owners on the importance of cleaning up after their dogs.

The attraction of flies, gnats, and bad smells can be a neighborhood nuisance if yards are not maintained. Some property management companies and condo associations are seeing the benefit of using a pooper-scooper service to maintain their common areas.

For some dog owners, finding a workable solution has been either to clean it up or to ignore it. These days, health-conscious dog owners are paying more attention to their dogs' living environment and taking more of a proactive approach in dealing with the dog poop left on the ground...

The Association of Professional Animal Waste Specialists (aPaws) provides that solution. The non-profit organization's website, http://www.apaws.org, provides a directory of pooper-scooper companies in different states who can help any dog owner who may be looking for a workable solution to keeping their yards cleared of dog poop.

The above is only an excerpt. If you can't stand the suspense, read the whole thing here. And if you have a pet, and your eyes and/or nose work, why would you need a reminder to clean up after your dog?

As someone who works in public relations, I thank God that I don't have to write about any type of poop as part of my job. The day I would have to write something like this is also the day I would "accidentally" drive my car off a bridge.

What's with the Hubschrauber?

Today on FFH the traffic reports are from someone who sounds like she's in a helicopter (Hubschrauber -- yet another German word that's totally fun to say). I've never heard that before on this station. It's so annoying. Kind of like a laugh track during a TV comedy or typewriter background noises during the radio news.

Looking for a pet?

Want a cat but without the litterbox hassle? There's a guy who will be your pet cat.

I want to be your cat
I'm hiring myself out as a pet cat to anyone who wants to own me. I truly believe I would make a great pet cat, much better than your typical cat. If you're interested we'll sign a one year contract, renegotiable at the end of the term. Basically, I'll provide all the services of a pet cat, while you pay for all my food and housing, plus incidentals.

Regenbogen

What a strange day. This afternoon I went to the funeral of a co-worker. He was only a few years older than me. I had a hard time keeping it together. I didn't know him well at all, but my heart broke for his family and friends. On the way home I saw a rainbow. It was so close -- right in my neighborhood.

Hobbies

There's a fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness." -- Dave Barry

Robert's Rules, again!

What I know we must all be thinking when the Robert's Rules start flying. "No, you have to forward the motion and then someone has to second it..." AAAaaaah!

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

Silly mutts

More Mutts.

Bully-boy follies

Mike Luckovich, from the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, has a great editorial cartoon that mocks the U.S. for their bully-boy attitude and actions regarding Iran. Here.

See his 2005 Pulitzer-winning cartoons. Click on "See gallery of winning cartoons" and click on "close the ad." (An annoying comes up before you get to see the cartoons.)

Pig Olympics

I wonder what thought process led to the pig olympics?

MOSCOW (Reuters) - Hundreds of Russians gathered for the first day of the annual "pig Olympics" on Saturday, cheering a field of 12 piglets who competed in three events: pig-racing, pig-swimming and "pigball"...

Alexei Sharshkov, vice-president of the Sport-Pig Federation, which claims 100 members, said the competitors had a happy future ahead of them, win or lose.

"They go on to produce a new generation of sport pigs. They don't get eaten," he promised. "How could you eat a competitor who is known around the world?"

Hand-painted coffins

On a recent Weekend Edition (NPR), a quite interesting story about a woman who makes hand-painted coffins. (Coffin is "der Sarg" in German. It looks like the English word "sarge," as in short for "sargeant." My linguistical mind whirls.)

At first I thought this was quite a stupid idea. But I started to warm to the idea, very slightly. The artist said many of her clients use the coffins as furniture before they die. And, one particular customer will use it for furniture and will only be displayed in it briefly before being cremated. The coffin will go back to her family to be used as a bookcase. (Photos and story.) Most aren't too creepy, unlike the one at left.

I find the whole coffin topic extra creepy right now. In The Great Influenza, the author talks about how there were coffin shortages during the Spanish influenza epidemic. From Wikipedia:

A letter from a physician at one U.S. Army camp in the 1918 pandemic said:

It is only a matter of a few hours then until death comes [...]. It is horrible. One can stand it to see one, two or twenty men die, but to see these poor devils dropping like flies [...]. We have been averaging about 100 deaths per day [...]. Pneumonia means in about all cases death [...]. We have lost an outrageous number of Nurses and Drs. It takes special trains to carry away the dead. For several days there were no coffins and the bodies piled up something fierce [...].

Dipping toe into snob pool

This post is the funniest thing I've read in a long time. It's a real story.

Robert schmobert

I know that procedures are important. It's also important to cover all the eventualities. That being said, Robert's Rules of Order make me crazy. Can we just get something done for the love of Pete? See EclectChick's entry re: California legislation on "vampire appliances." The text of the legislation demonstrates why government seems to lag behind a snail's pace.

Spouse-a-cide

From today's daily Onion. Oh so sick. Oh so funny!

How Can I Put a Price on My Wife's Head?
I've been married to Lani for nine interminable years, and the degree to which I despise, from the bottom of my heart, her every annoying syllable, carping over each tiny detail of our unbearable life together, is simply beyond measure...

...My wife—God curse her soul—has outlived her gracious welcome on this planet. The time has come to put all of her deeds, bad and worse, in the grand balance, punch in a per-unit cost, and arrive at a just, fair price for someone to push her off the roof of our condomimium and make it look like suicide.

Peeps ueber alles!

This year's Peeps Diorama Contest winners announced! The Pioneer Press printed the winners in Sunday's edition. Go to " Power to the Peep-le," then click on Take a Peep at the Peeps (about half way down the page). You will find weird and wonderful things.

Maybe I'll enter next year. I need to give it a big think.

Worse than Harding!

Great article online in Mother Jones about the president.

History Ambushes the Bush Administration
By Tom Engelhardt
COMMENTARY: On the domestic and foreign fronts -- from triumph to near collapse in less than five years. [Emphasis mine.]

You can count on one thing. All over Washington, Republicans are at least as capable as I am of watching and interpreting the polling version of the smash-up of the Bush administration. With each new poll, the numbers creep lower yet. Presidential approval in the latest Washington Post-ABC News poll dropped another 3% in the last month and now sits at 38%, while disapproval of the President continues to strengthen -- 47% of Americans now "strongly disapprove" of the President's handling of the presidency, only 20% "strongly approve." (62%, by the way, disapprove of the President's handling of the war in Iraq.)

I bet he has no idea, seeing as he's so open to things outside his opinion. Historical rankings on Wikipedia.

Tax day

Today is tax day. Better get that return postmarked by 11:59 p.m. In honor of today, here's a quote from one of Garrison Keillor's monologues (not reflective of my tax return, I might add):

"Your tax return and mine are sloppy, all the math is wrong. They're a tissue of lies."

Ya, like it says

Today's note from the universe:

An end result, imagined clearly and acted upon with expectation will always force the circumstances necessary to bring about its own manifestation, no matter how unpredictable, unlikely or even impossible those circumstances may have previously seemed.

Like clockwork,
The Universe

Hairdos

When I was at a stoplight today I saw a woman in hair rollers. She was the passenger in a mini van behind me. A middle-aged woman, head completely engulfed in rollers.

I haven't seen that in ages. When I was growing up there was a woman across the street who always was in hair rollers. It didn't matter what she was doing -- hanging out the laundry, mowing the lawn, gardening, driving the kids somewhere. I never saw her hair, ever.

Maladjusted

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

Beer bath

Story from AFP.

CHODOVA PLANA, Czech Republic (AFP) - With West Bohemia's six traditional spa resorts competing vigorously for custom with special health programmes and weekend health breaks, the brewery decided it required a different recipe.

"We had the beer, we had a mineral spring nearby and we came up with the idea of beer baths," explained Mojmir Prokes, the young manager of the hotel and adjoining beer spa, who enthused over their "reinvigorating effects," especially for the skin. (Story continues here.)

Chodovar brewery site.

Eco housing, in England (swoon)

I received an unsolicited copy of Smart Homeowner in the mail. Normally I throw such things in the recycling bin. But this one had a quite interesting story, "It Takes an Eco-Village" -- about how you can improve energy efficiency and lessen your environmental footprint via an eco-village. (It sounds like a commune but it's not.) It features BedZED, a "...The Beddington Zero Energy Development, to give it its full handle - is an energy-efficient, sustainable project," in Surrey, England.

I'd like to move to BedZED. (Another story about it here.) I wouldn't mind living closer to London, either.

Spring and werewolves

This morning on the way to work saw the first fuzzy trees. You know, those first signs of buds that make the trees look, well, fuzzy. I just love spring. The warm days when you can, gasp, go without socks! And the cools nights when you can leave the windows open and use all the covers.

Last night about 2 a.m. Sophie had to go outside. It was pretty light out from the full moon. There were several dogs howling in the distance. I don't live in the country so this was pretty odd. Maybe the full moon is why I haven't been sleeping well this week. My body is trying to avoid turning into a werewolf and that takes all the energy usually reserved for keeping me asleep.

That or the weirdo dreams -- like the one a couple of days ago. I was picking a friend, who I hadn't seen in years, at the airport. We got to the parking ramp and some guys tried to carjack us. I said if they got of the car I'd give them all the money in my purse. They complied, I threw the money out the window and squealed off down the ramp. Then last night I dreamed that I was on spring break in Florida with all the college students. I rented a really nice, big house on the beach. People were walking through the house to the beach, rather than walking around, and frat boys were wrecking the living room. Honestly, none of these things have been on my mind lately. One night, please, just sleeeep. Is that so much to ask?

Perfect for Mother's Day

"My Baby Got Stole... By a Bear Holding a Shark!!" I think it would make a nice Mother's Day gift. I can just see my Mom with all the quilting ladies. They'd try not to say anything. They'd just keep looking at the shirt thinking, "What am I missing?" Purchaseable from the Homestar Runner site.

Peephenge and more

I'm trying to keep myself amused until the Pioneer Press publishes its annual Peeps diorama contest winners (Sunday, April 16). In the mean time, there's Peephenge (right) and Fear Response in Peeps (below). The Peep blog on the Cooking with Peeps site is disturbingly funny (see March 29, "I found the secret to explosive Peeps").

Ode to a brilliant teacher

The world lost a great teacher and scholar this week. Dr. James H. Burtness was a seminary professor for many years. His area of specialization was ethics and he was particularly known for his work on Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a Lutheran pastor killed by the Nazis in 1945.

Dr. Burtness'’ class on Bonhoeffer was one of the first I took at seminary. I was a new, part-time student with no declared program. I was pretty nervous about being in this class with such a great scholar, as well as a room full of senior Master of Divinity students (students studying to be pastors)!

I was immediately taken with culture of the class. Dr. Burtness didn'’t try to prove how smart he was. He just wanted you to jump in and be as excited as he was about Bonhoeffer'’s work. I don't know that it would have been possible to leave that class without being completely taken in by Bonhoeffer's scholarship. I certainly was!

He encouraged us all to join the International Bonhoeffer Society so that we could stay in touch with the latest scholarship. Three years later I made a life-changing trip to Cape Town, South Africa for the IBS Congress. Dr. Burtness' class touched off a lifelong study of Bonhoeffer's work -- one of the biggest impacts on my faith and life.

Dr. Burtness' laugh was deep and joyful and sounded like it came from his toes. For such a big thinker, he had a great personal touch. One class night happened to fall on Bonhoeffer'’s birthday. I had wondered if he would mention it. After the break we were all delighted when Dr. Burtness brought in a birthday cake and we all sang Happy Birthday. After our last class, he had us all over to his house for a beer. His approach to learning and enthusiasm for the gospel embodied the topic of the class.

The Areas of My Expertise

John Hodman's book, The Areas of My Expertise, is one of the weirdest, silliest, smartest books I've seen in a long time. Read the introduction online and you'll be hooked.

There's a great little story about him in Time which includes:

"I don't consider what I do comedy qua comedy," he says. "It's something much weirder."

He has a blog and also the 700 Hoboes Project, including the Hobo-of-the-moment. Defies description. You must see it for yourself.

Gummi murder

From Flickr via Blog on a Toothpick (a quite funny site).

Nice bruise; looks good on you

This lovely is from a door at the IMAX theater at the Minnesota Zoo. (The under-the-sea 3D movie was fabulous!) Then yesterday I was shaking up some salad dressing, got a little too vigorous and smacked this lovely into the corner of the refrigerator. Today it is a lovely shade of turquoise. Actually, I wouldn't mind all my nails that color. I've always looked nice in that color.

Peep surgery

I was surfing around for something fun to make for the kids for Easter, preferably with Peeps (the marshmallow bunnies, chickes, etc.). I found the Peep surgery page. Seriously messed up.

"One of the great mysteries of the Peep species is that these creatures are always born as conjoined quintuplets. Some scientists have theorized that this arrangement, much like pack behavior in other species, serves as a natural protection against predators. As evidence, note that Peeps are most often consumed by predators only after they have been separated from their siblings. Conversely, Peeps which remain attached to their siblings are rarely preyed upon."

Fresh air helps the MS Excel go down

Window is open fresh air
Spring is finally here!
I smell grass and dirt

Like the diversion
MS Excel deflates brain
Stare blankly at screen

Thanatopsis

Today's word of the day, thanks to EclectChick!

thanatopsis (than-uh-TOP-sis) noun

A reflection upon death.

[From Greek thanatos (death) + -opsis (appearance, view).]

Thanatos is the Greek personification of death; thanatophobia is an abnormal fear of death. Thanatopsis is the title of an acclaimed poem by poet and journalist William Cullen Bryant (1794-1878): http://bartleby.com/102/16.html

Simpsons classics

Some classic lines from the world’s silliest family:

• “Church fundraiser – this does not count as church” – sign outside church fundraiser
• “Manfred Manslaughter”– chief Wiggum to doctor who assists with suicides
• “We’re going to take his sass and turn it into siss” – bad-boy camp counselor to Bart’s parents
• Lil Agitator (brand name on the side of Lisa's bullhorn)
• “This isn't for you sweat stain” – Mo to Homer
• “Something about that boy shakes up your soda” – Marge to Bart re: Millhouse
• “Uppity box” – Cleetus (the hillbilly), referring to an elevator

Your turn to vote

Such ingenious entries! Now it's your turn to vote. Which of these most accurately reflects what is going on in the picture below?

Caption contest

And, as the spaceship hovered over my hosta garden ... After tough questioning - Rumsfield attempts to hypnotize reporters. "We will soon unveil humanoid soldiers, which are able to shoot bullets from each of their fingers!" "Let’s do the Time Warp again!!!!!!!" “Oh, the shark has pretty teeth, dear. And he keeps them pearly white . . ..” PROOF!! Donald Rumsfield IS the Evil Emporer Palpatine! Fed up with the line of questioning, Rumsfield evilly began controlling the media like puppets. " . . . and I can kill you with my brain. Oh wait, I'm missing the equipment." Just like that. Free polls from Pollhost.com

This entry, though brilliant, was too long to post in the Pollhost form.

He is levitating a sleeping Dick Cheney three feet above the floor (the photo has been cropped). Shortly after the picture was taken a reporter belched, breaking Rumsfeld's concentration and causing Cheney to hit the floor with a hard thud!

Blackadder!

Rowan Atkinson is a comic genius. As Blackadder, his looks of disdain are priceless. I wonder if that's who Vince Vaughn studied prior to taking on the big screen.

Test your Black Adder knowledge on the BBC site. And, joy of joys, there's a quote generator!

Blackadder: Baldrick, does it have to be this way? Our valued friendship ending with me cutting you up into strips and telling the prince that you walked over a very sharp cattle grid in an extremely heavy hat?

Baldrick: Well, Mr Blackadder always says, when the going gets tough, the tough hide under the table.

Just because I have nothing to say...

This artist's blog, The Dullest Blog in the World is hysterical. I hope he starts updating it more often.

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

The Joker's cat cousin

I'm a softy for lions and dogs. This cug is at the zoo in Nuremberg. He/she could get a role in the next Batman movie as the Joker.

Speaking of cute animals, check out this blog (and here) for photos of blackbird family, including babies! Don't worry, the photographer didn't touch them. Isn't spring grand!

Gummi bacon

Archie McPhee has the best collection of oddities I've ever seen (e.g., brain gelatin mold, ceramic smoking baby, world's largest underpants, seven deadly sins wristbands, avenging unicorn playset).

Today I found gummi bacon on the Archie site. I'm a big fan of most things gummi but I'm not sure about this. I do like the bacon bandages and wrapping paper. I think I'll pass on the air freshener. It looks funny but I think the smell would drive me batty.

I haven't been able to find the gummi rats in months (except to buy them in bulk online). Cale and Tori have been asking for them. Maybe I can placate them with gummi meat.

This would be perfect for EclectChick and Christopher (act surprised on your birthdays!).