04 July 2007

A surprise for Indepence Day

From the Borowitz Report. Andy Borowitz is fiendishly clever. His bogus news stories are like a release valve, letting off a bit of the stress from the latest annoying or aggravating news from the current administration. Today's story:

Cheney Declares Himself National Monument
Latest Attempt to Dodge Subpoena

In a bold new strategy to avoid a congressional subpoena, Vice President Dick Cheney today declared himself a national monument.

Mr. Cheney took the unorthodox step only after failing in his attempt to invoke a little-known legal principle called the separation of Cheney and state.

Aides to Mr. Cheney confirmed that being a national monument gives the vice president not only immunity from subpoenas, but also a draft deferment in perpetuity.

President George W. Bush presided over a solemn White House ceremony this morning in which a plaque documenting Mr. Cheney’s status as a national monument was affixed to the vice president’s midsection...

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Michael said...

Hahaha. They should stick it in a South East Asian rice paddy and have John Bolton stand guard ;)

Sophzilla said...

What a lovely idea! Maybe they could get two made and put the other in Faluja. Paul Wolfowitz could guard that one.

Sanning said...

Not unlike the monument Absalom erected to himself in the Valley of the Kings, I should think...