Makes me feel smart

I love stories about stupid criminals. It's Schadenfreude along with a bit of superiority. "No matter what, I'd never by that stupid."

From News of the Weird. You can get their daily e-mail which is delightful in a twisted way.

Your Daily Losers
If you're a couple carrying $2.5m worth of cocaine, you might stay on the highway itself rather than driving on the shoulder, and more important, you might anticipate what your cover story's going to be if you get stopped. Like, if you're visiting "cousins," are they the husband's cousins or the wife's? If they're yours, why don't you know their names? When did you last see them (5 yrs ago, or last month)? Thus, Jose and Virginia Melendez and their 21-yr-old daughter are in lockup. Omaha World-Herald

Stupid git

In April, Congressional candidate Tony Zirkle (Indiana) agreed to speak at a gathering of the American National Socialist Workers' Party. His platform consists mainly of opposing pornography and prostitution. He's also in favor of bringing back the guillotine. The gathering was a birthday party for Adolf Hitler.

Zirkle claims that he didn't know that the group was pro-Nazi because they were called National Socialists, not Nazis. This despite the giant portrait of Hitler, everyone at the head table wearing swastikas and the Happy Birthday Hitler banner. The Indiana Republican party is distancing itself from Mr. Zirkle.

More.

Money well spent?

There are reasons why Americans don't trust the government to spend money wisely. From the Colorado Springs Gazette via News of the Weird.

Gamblers' Shuttle Gets Terrorism Funds
Colorado Springs-based Ramblin Express, which shuttles gamblers to mountain-town casinos, including Cripple Creek, has received $382,000 in anti-terrorism grants.

The most recent grant, for $184,415, was announced this month as part of the Department of Homeland Security's $844 million Infrastructure Protection Activities program.

Ramblin Express' grant is among the $11.2 million allocated to the Intercity Bus Security Grant Program, which is intended to assess risks and prevent attacks on that part of the nation's transportation system. Rest of story.

Clientcopia

Clientcopia is a collection of stupid-client stories. You don't have to be a services organization to laugh at these. Anyone who deals with other human beings will find these horrifyingly funny.

Stupid Client Quote #5403

We recently began invoicing via e-mail (beats the cost of postage, faster and, face it - we're a web company so why would we not?).

Customer: I got this invoice in my email...

Us: Okay

Customer: Well I need a printed version for accounting to pay it.

Us: Okay - if you use the print function in your email to print out that invoice you'll have a copy to give to the accounting department.

Customer: But I need a printed version, not email...

Us: We are no longer sending out "print" invoices, just via email. Do you have a printer attached to the computer that you receive email on?

Customer: Yes

Us: Do you know how to print off the email?

Customer: Yes

Us: Then I suggest you just print the email for accounting.

Customer: But we need a print version...

*sigh* I gave up and printed the email and put in the mail to them, miraculously a payment arrived on schedule.

Unintended consequences

This has been all over the news but I can't help but comment.

I work in marketing and I'm pretty peeved at these dopes who have given the profession another black eye. How could they not think through the possible consequences of such a stunt?

Turner Promotion Mistaken for Terrorist Threat
Boston Shuts Down Roads to Assess Danger of Ad Campaign

By Andrew Hampp
Published: January 31, 2007

NEW YORK (AdAge.com) -- The alien-like Mooninites of Cartoon Network's "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" invaded the country rather quietly earlier this earlier this month until one touched down at a Boston intersection yesterday morning.

Shutdown
The Turner network launched a 10-city outdoor marketing campaign for its film "Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theatres" involving small circuit boxes labeled with the characters scattered across the streets ... The boxes had been in place for two to three weeks, but Boston officials perceived them to be potential bomb threats, temporarily shutting the city's Interstate 93, a key inbound roadway, a bridge connecting Boston and Cambridge, and a portion of the Charles River.

The campaign was conducted by Turner in collaboration with New York marketing firm Interference.

The boxes depict a "a middle-finger-waving moon man" (CNN). Boston's mayor and police are not amused and it sounds like there will be fines and jail time. Two people have already been arrested.

Interference is a "A nationwide guerilla and alternative marketing agency from idiation through tactile implementation and staffing." If you pull up their Web site, you get a blank screen.